Elton John's "Mellow"

We were lying side by side jerking off. I had my head pressed against the top of his chest. The had recently set outside his window behind some clouds, the sky now a deep shade of blue, something approaching black. There were deep shadows that ran down his chest, the outline of his pecs, of his abs, clearer than normal in this lighting. It was a beautiful sight. Every now and then I would cast my eyes out the window to take in the sight of the sky. There were lingering storm clouds, majestic looking things against an evening sky. His beautiful body, the beautiful sky, and back and forth, back and forth, hands stroking his cock or mine.

The skyline was familiar, a comforting thing to see. This guy lives two blocks from where I used to live on Meserole Street. I recognized the buildings out his window, saw the spires of that one church, the clouds forming some spectacular shapes behind it.

I had been lying in my bed earlier in the day, tired after having drank a bottle of rose with Diego in our backyard, had been napping, looking at various things on my phone, Scruff among them.

There was a message from this guy. I immediately perked up from my sleepiness and messaged him back. I didn't think I was going to hear from this guy anymore, had given on him. This is the guy that I hooked up with on 4/20 and who I had thought was so cute and sexy. I was a stoned mess that day and so the sex wasn't that great, and I had assumed that's why he never really responded to my messages to him afterwards.

Two messages were exchanged, a how's it going, a I want to touch your body, before he asked me to come over. I threw on some clothes and rushed over to his house. We smoked some weed at his apartment and then took off our clothes and had really fun sex against his window as the sky did incredible things.

After we wiped ourselves off with tissues and put on some clothes, he offered me a cookie sandwich that he had made. I stood in his kitchen eating this massive thing even though I don't really like eating sweets, did so just because it was something he had made, something he had offered, and as it was more reason to hang out with him and chat some more.

And I wish it wasn't true about not wanting things, not desiring things - that it's when you want something, want someone, that you are not going to get it, that only once you have forgotten about your desire for a thing does that thing come your way.

I walked home from his house, enjoying the dark sky, knowing that I had seen it shift to this current color over the past hour or so, knowing that things change but not that much and that if you keep your eyes on the thing, the changes are subtle, slow, that the transition makes sense.